🎭 Opening Bit
“Hey everyone! Great to see you’re all here—not trading crypto on your phones under the table. Let’s talk money, markets, and corporate chaos from the past 24 hours!”

---

🛫 Boeing’s “Grounded” Performance
So Boeing just had a rough day—stocks dove over 6% after that Dreamliner crash in India. Not their best safety record or stock record for the week bloomberg.com+3foxbusiness.com+3abcnews.go.com+3investors.com+1foxbusiness.com+1. Boeing must be thinking, “Well, I guess tonight I’m grounded… just not in the way I meant!”

---

📉 Tariff Tantrums
Apparently, President Trump dropped a bombshell—Tariff talks are back like bad Wi-Fi. He’s ending the 90-day break on July 9, and futures are tanking. Dow’s down 300 points, S&P off 0.6%, Nasdaq playing sad trombone too investors.com. Wall Street: “Plot twist! Just when we thought it was safe.”

---

💸 Inflation Watch
Investors are busy staring at inflation and jobless claims like it’s the final season of a binge-worthy show. May’s PPI is expected +0.2% monthly (2.6% yearly), core inflation +0.3% (3.1% yearly), jobless claims maybe easing a bit investors.com. Basically, the economy is that awkward relationship: not breaking up, but not moving in together either.

---

☁️ Oracle’s Cloud Nine
In happier news (if spreadsheets make you giddy), Oracle soared 8% after delivering strong earnings and hyping up its AI/cloud future investors.com. Their execs were like, “Trust us, AI is the answer” and investors replied, “Shut up and take my money!”

---

🎢 Market Rollercoaster
Despite the crazy ride—tariffs, jet crashes, inflation jitters—the market’s still somewhat bullish. Analysts say, “Diversify, baby, but keep your helmet on.” Good advice unless your helmet is a Bitcoin tattoo investors.com.

---

🎤 Closing One-Liner
“So there you have it: planes dropping, tariffs popping, inflation … well, inflating, but Oracle’s just daydreaming in the cloud. Tune in tomorrow—if the Dow hasn’t done a triple backflip by then!”